Fifty Years Old And Never married
The first thing you should realize if you are over 50 and have never been married is that it is possible to have a healthy and happy single life.
Many single people over 50 have had at least one divorce and it might make you feel like you went wrong somewhere. This is not the case.
Everyone’s case is unique and I’m sure you have your own set of reasons for being single at 50. Regardless, there is a whole world of singles out there and you are not too old to take advantage of it.
Don’t Worry What Friends And Family Think
The next most important thing you need to realize is that, while you may not be damaged goods, many will rush to that judgement.
It’s natural to think that, if you are over 50 and not married, you must have been doing something wrong or you are not a good person to date. It’s up to you to show them that you are just as desirable as someone who has tried marriage and failed.
Retain your confidence and show them that you are not married simply because you never found the right person.
The “TODAY” Show did a survey that found that, out of the singles over 50 surveyed, only 18 percent said that they were dating. 40 percent of them said that they were thinking about it, but they were not actually doing it.
The other 60 percent said that they don’t need a relationship to be happy. Why would 40 percent think about it and not do it? You have the experience to do it right now and dating can be amazing if you open yourself up to it.
You Know Better What You Want In Your Fifties
The truth is; most people make better decisions about who they date when they start getting older. It’s especially true at an age like 50 when you are old enough to have some wisdom, but you still have some pep in your step.
When we are young, we have hormones raging and we have our whole life in front of us. We tend to be a little more reckless and tend to date whomever excites us. At 50, you have already been through that.
One dating solution that more and more people over fifty are using is online dating. It’s a growing phenomenon and shows no sign of losing popularity with any age bracket any time soon.
If you haven’t met someone online then you probably know someone else who has. Sites like Ourtime.com, SinglesOver50.com, 50plus-club.com, and SeniorMatch.com connect you with other singles your age in a way that is compatible with your lifestyle.
Many single over 50 also use standard dating sites like Match.com and OK Cupid and their numbers are growing every day.
The drawback with online dating is that you will likely have to go through some duds before you have any success. It is very easy for you to sign up and publish your profile, but it’s also easy for spammers and for people to pose as something that they are not.
19 thoughts on “Fifty Years Old And Never married”
I have several friends that fit that bill. They seem totally content with it. I do notice however that pets are like children to them. I suppose never being married, or a father puts them in a place where pets become family. Which is awesome I’m a animal lover, and I know these lucky fur babies are loved.
I am married, but I truly believe it is possible to be happy and content with your life even if you have never been. Some people believe that the single people who say that they are happy are just lying, but, if they have found their path in life, I do not think that it is necessary for them to have a wife/husband just to prove to the society that they are happy.
But you’re married . . . right? So you totally understand . . .
Comments such as these become so tiresome.
I think the notion that people have to be married in order to experience a happy, successful, fulfilled life is the main problem. Some of the happiest people I know are single, because they have learned to prioritize themselves and their happiness as the main goal in their life. Getting married can be the perfect endgame for some people, but for others, it’s not required.
I also know several over-50s people who are not married and seem happy and content. My younger brother is in his mid-50s. He had a high powered job that required a lot of traveling around the globe, and in the last few years he was also the manager of the head office. He has retired early, but instead of thinking about finding someone to settle down with, he is talking about trips he will take and investment projects he is involved with. When my Dad was still alive, my brother was the most caring son you could meet and my Dad lacked for nothing. He is a sort of “honorary uncle” to many young adults, and very fond of his neices and nephews. I used to feel sad that he hadn’t found a special mate, but now that I know many other people making the choices he has, I admire him for knowing himself well enough not to make a choice that might only reflect social pressures.
I have many friends that are not married but live with loved ones. Common law I think it is called. They feel more freedom not being married and have always felt that being tied down hinders them. Ultimately all that they crave is companionship and love. This they claim they get quite easily without the symbolism and ritualism of getting married. To me, they already are married just by living together for over 5 years. This is simply how they choose to live. Dating at 50, in my opinion is definitely easier, since there is no run around and inexperience that comes with dating young. Being older means you have lived and know exactly what you want, no beating around the bush as they say,
At my age, I am not as picky as I was in my twenties. I wonder how successful are some of the online dating sites in helping to find a mate. One of my girlfriends used general dating sites and all she seem to attract was the duds and weirdos. She gave up, but I encouraged her to try the Singles Over Fifty dating site. I am hopeful that she can meet some decent mature men. I have several friends who desire to meet someone special and get married. One of my close friends, in particular, desires this but she doesn’t do anything out of her norm. She basically stays at home and takes care of other people. I think a dating site would be the best fit for her.
Yes yes yes, I agree with this post completely. I think that a lot of people in almost all ages think that if they’re not dating someone is because there’s something wrong with them and most of them don’t have a really positive perspective about the future when it comes to happiness and emotional well being, and I think that we need to change that perspective, not because we’re single means that we’re unhappy or repressed, for some people actually can mean more freedom, and I think that’s amazing, we need to surround ourselves with things and people that makes us happy and we also need to adjust that way of thinking that almost everyone does at this point. And also, I think that online dating is an excellent idea. 🙂
The last steady guy I dated I met when I was 50 years old, we were friends then more for 4 years.it didn’t work out as I had hoped and we didn’t get married.
I have never been married. I am now 59 years old. I really do not have the emotional stamina for on line dating. I met so many weirdos it had just been a depressing experience for me.
I always had loads of boyfriends my whole life but really did not find the right one for marriage at the right time. I am basically a loving, caring and loyal woman and know how to make a relationship work.
However, I do not feel at this point that I will meet a man to date. They all look like my dad to me. Perhaps I look like their mom.
I do not think it will ever happen for me..
I have a neat figure and turn heads. Just not catching fire in the romance department anymore. Truthfully, I thought I would be married by now. I never envisioned the solitary life I have now. I am tired of going out alone all the time, it is also expensive to live alone and I can’t afford to go all over trying to meet a man. Just have to take care of myself and my future and this point. I never thought this would be how my life would be.
It is not fun being single at all. There are men out there who would marry me I am sure. But I do not think they are for me. Many of them are sick with many problems. I just don’t see it happening for me.
Thank you for this comment you expressed exactly how I feel! Being single at 51 seems like a curse I don’t deserve, but I honestly don’t think it’s in the cards for me
Turning 50 in 3 months and feeling very lonely. I’ve been pining away for the same man for more than 16 years now. Due to recent events, I thought we were on the verge of finally being together, but once again I was wrong. And not only wrong, but like it was our last chance and there is no coming back from what just happened. I don’t expect to ever get an explanation. I was really looking forward to 50 with this man, but now I feel like dreams do not come true, at least not for me and that I will be alone for the rest of my life. Very sad.
Also, online dating? Nope. Been there, done that since the old “pen pal” days. Pit of despair if you ask me.
I just turned 50 in March and never married. Recently a date asked me why I never got married. I told her I never found the right person but I have to say it can be very hard not thinking something is wrong with me or I have screwed up somehow. I mean how can you not think it for a moment. Some days are better than others but I have to say for me I attended the same church for years and they insisted we only date members of the church. It’s a huge church that is in other states and countries. Some found their mates in the church. Most of my friends did…I never did. Do I feel like a looser sometimes, yes. How can I not? Recently I started dating outside the church…I have been a member for 20 years…but it’s challenging. Women are different outside the church of course and I’m not a bar guy. I can go to a club or bar but meeting someone at these places after all this time is difficult so I’m going to go online. I’m not 100% content being alone . I enjoy my freedom but I want to be with someone also.
The classic notion of marriage forced people to tolerate a lot. But they had good reason. Many of us have such different expectations of marriage from our parents and grandparents and there’s no real model for how to get there.
Oh well, I resigned myself to the fact that what is – I don’t want. And what I want – doesn’t exist.
Well lets face it which today unfortunately is a very completely different time that we now live in since the real good old days are all gone now when finding real true love back then was certainly very very easy to find the way that it did for our family members that many of them are still together now as i speak. Most women back then were the very complete opposite of what these women are today since the women of today are so very pathetic losers altogether now since they will only want the very best of all and will never ever settle for less either which is why many of us very good innocent men never met the Right Good Woman for us to Accept us for who we really are. And what i mean by that is with so many women today that have their Careers now are so very high maintenance, independent, selfish, spoiled, greedy, picky, narcissists, and are so very money hungry these days really speaks for itself right there since unfortunately it is only about them nowadays. This is a very Excellent Reason why many of us Good Men never met the Right Woman at all which certainly explains that since it is the kind of women that are out there these days that have really caused this real mess in the first place to begin with. So it is these women of today that are at Fault and Not us men since we really have No Reason at all too Blame ourselves to begin with in the first place. It is very sad how the women of today have really Changed for the Worst of all since Most of the women in the good old days really did put these women today to Real Shame as well since it really does Take Two Too Tango Today.
I definitely feel as if something is wrong with me because no one loves me. I have been in a couple if relationships in my life, both lasting less than 4 years. I ended both relationships because I knew there was no future with either man. The last relationship ended almost 20 years ago. Since then I’ve had a few dates, had a few encounters, but nothing meaningful and definitely no relationship. I am intelligent enough, honest enough, mature enough, and have enough self-awareness to know that looks aren’t the reason. Neither is my education, attitude, personality, income, etc. Because there are plenty of women with happy relationships who have more than what I have, less than what I have, are better than me, worse off than me, or who seem to be so similar to me. So, I have come to believe that it isn’t meant for me to have someone who can love me and I can love back. I live a full life and have probanly done anything anyone can suggest regarding meeting quality men. And knowing that, despite everything, I am always alone, has had a huge negative impact on my life. I have spent a lot of time being unhappy because of this vonstant desire that has gone unfulfilled, then I feel guilty for being so unhappy. How can I be so ungrateful just because i dont have a life partner with all the blessings I have when others have suffered all kinds of horrors and trauma? I have prayed for thus desire to go away so I can be content but it hasn’t happened yet. So I continue to have this hope that is irrational considering my age. I know God has always had a plan for my life and I continue to trust H yo show me the way.
I am 56, never married, no children, even dates are hard to come by. Yes I have tried many online dating sites, and the normal answer is thanks, but no thanks when you are interested in meeting someone. Yes, being single does have its freedom to do what you want, when you want. But also is the desire for a closer friendship and companionship with that special lady. Sure, taking up new hobbies and interests, travel, even having a pet can help alleviate those down days and quite easy to fall into the depressed mode and think about what could be. I envy those who have at least been in a relationship, married and yes, had children too. For some of us singles, that is one of many things that we crave for and long to cherish.
I am almost 50, and I have never been married either. Growing up I always assumed I would get married in my 30s and have one or two kids. I went through a major grieving process when I came to terms with the fact that I would not have children. I know some single women who have adopted, and in my early 30s I went through foster parent training figuring that if a child was placed with me and we clicked, I could pursue adoption. But then my mom got very sick and passed away. I have always been an introvert with a small, close circle of friends. When my mom passed, I was left feeling like I did not have an extensive enough support network to make it as a single mom, so I stopped pursuing fostering as an option. I still hoped to meet the right guy and have a child with him -either naturally or by adoption or by step-parenting, but that did not happen. I still hope to meet someone, but I also know I will never marry just for the sake of being married. I would rather be happily single than be married to a man I did not love. I go through periods of online dating. It’s fun for awhile. It’s fun to meet a bunch of new guys and learn about their backgrounds. It can be a nice way to fill up my social calendar, and since my closest friends are all women, it is just nice to have some guy-time. But I do think my history of never having been married is a flag for a lot of the guys. I am explicit about being monogamous and not seeking hookups, so I weed out players. The guys left tend to be divorced with kids (often grown kids), and I think most of them end up feeling the most comfortable with women who have also been divorced and have had children or else they felt so burned by their divorce that they are really not ready to risk getting close to another woman again- even they they think they want to. .I seldom get to date 3 or 4. My last long-term relationship was 3 years ago, and it lasted just over a year. He had ended a 10 year relationship about a year previously, and I thought I had finally met the one, but after the honeymoon phase was over and the hard work of compromising to meet both of our needs was needed, he backed out. I was just his rebound, although I honestly don’t think in the beginning he thought of me that way. I think I will continue to date on and off in my 50s as much as I can when I feel like it as a kind of get-out-of-the-house past-time, but I no longer think I will eventually meet a life partner. I am fortunate to live in an area where online dating is socially acceptable and still rather active amongst 50-somethings, and I am fortunate to have a close circle of friends which include other women who have never been married and have no children. We agree that we will be each other’s caretakers when we get old. I guess I am most worried about the fact that since we aren’t related by marriage or blood that we will have trouble with helping manage medical and legal issues for each other if any of us in our circle get very sick. That;s my biggest regret about having never been married or having had children.
My older brother is approaching 50 and has never been married. I got married a few years ago and at my wedding, I heard him joking that he is not surprised I beat him to a wedding and he likely would never get married. Some people just aren’t built for marriage. He is dating someone new every 2 or 3 years and seem happy to live life that way. He had 2 children in his 20s as well.
I’m 62 and have never been married. Never really dated. I’m still a virgin and that is what I hate most about my life. I guess there are people who are fine going without sex and intimacy but I’m not one of them. The frustration is unbearable and it seems like sex is further away now than it has ever been. Nothing else about my life is good either. The only time in my life when I was happy was the 8 months I spent traveling across the west in 2009. I hate my life I really do. I feel like it has been a complete waste of time. I wanted to get married and have kids, a family. To have a love life and a sex life. Instead all I got was s**t.