In Praise Of Middle-Aged Singledom
Guess what, there are benefits to being over 50 and single. There, I said it.
I know because I’m here right now, and it’s not all as bad as it seems, because there are many benefits.
The biggest benefit is that we know more about ourselves.
When you think back to friends that have been married – that maybe got married in their early twenties. How many do you know that are still married, or at least, happily married?
Chances are it’s maybe not that many.
We Change So Much Over The Years
I’ve changed and grown so much over the years, from my 20s, that I think I would have been long divorced if I married back then.
Perhaps I would have already had three marriages under my belt…god forbid!
But at the end of the day, we are where we are, and I think the blessing is that we all would make different choices today than we would have earlier on in our lives.
We would have made better choices.
In fact, I do make better choices today than I would have years ago, even two years ago.
I think the benefit of reaching middle age is knowing our preferences.
In our 50s, we know, much more clearly, what we like and don’t like, what we can and can’t tolerate.
We’re calmer. I think we’re more relaxed.
Things don’t get to us just as much as they would when we were in our 30s, for example.
We no longer worry about the things we used to worry about, once we arrive in middle age.
It’s not that we have no worries, but we have clearer perspectives on life, and we can better put those worries into perspective.
We Can Finally Focus On Ourselves
It allows us to focus on our own emotional well-being and explore our desires, needs, and aspirations.
Without the distractions and demands of a romantic relationship, we can dedicate time and energy to introspection, self-reflection, and self-improvement.
This period of self-discovery can lead us to a deeper understanding of ourselves, increased self-confidence, and a stronger sense of identity.
Things don’t get to us all, just as much as they would when we were in our 30s for example.
Our Confidence Continues To Grow
The other thing I believe is we attain more confidence.
With age comes wisdom, and with wisdom comes confidence in knowing who we are.
Yes, there are still things to find out, but we’re more confident in our skin.
So, if you are middle-aged and single, enjoy it! Nothing stays the same forever.
Look at the good things that happen when you’re middle-aged and single.
You get to do what you want.
Nobody’s looking at what you’re doing. You can leave dirty dishes in your sink. You can sleep in. You can binge on Netflix like nobody’s judging you.
So, there’s a lot of freedom in being single, and we forget about that sometimes when we find ourselves pining for a romantic relationship.
We think about what’s missing, as opposed to what’s not missing.
Think about that the next time you’re in this position.
It’s okay if you want a relationship and want to find love in your life. It could well be coming. In fact, it could be just around the corner.
However, in the meantime, be comfortable in your own skin and appreciate what you’ve got.
If you want to change things, change them. You have it within your power.
Where do you see yourself in a year from now? Perhaps you’ll be in a very contented relationship, or perhaps you’ll still be single.
If you do want to dip your toes back into the world of dating, we’ve done some reviews of the best sites for over 50s dating here
But the point is do not fret or worry over this future.
It’s just like the butterfly analogy – try to chase a butterfly and you probably won’t catch it, but just sit still and chances are it might just land on your shoulder.
Appreciate the fact that singledom can mean happiness
It’s much better to be single and happy than to be in a miserable relationship, especially when you’re over 50.
So really, the point of my article is just to state that nothing is wrong with you if you are single in middle age.
Contrary to societal stereotypes, being single does not equate to loneliness or unhappiness.
Instead, it offers a unique chance for your own self-discovery, your personal growth, and the freedom to live life on your terms.
Whether you choose to remain single or eventually find a partner, the benefits of being single over 50 are multiple.
So why not embrace this chapter of your life with an open mind and maintain your sense of adventure?
Embracing the present moment enables you to live life to the fullest, right now.